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Talking to someone who shifts gears mid conversation can be so frustrating. I know this because I talk to myself all the time and can very rarely ever keep up. My mind takes me for a whirlwind sometimes. It’s kind of crazy. Meanwhile my left brain won’t shut up and just keeps yapping away like an annoying significant other at 3:30 in the morning who can afford to stay up that late because she’s a senior in college, meanwhile I have work in the AM and keep trying to lead the conversation to bed so I can catch some Zzz.

I have a lot of respect for the Randal in Clerks. He never forgets who he is and he’s happy about where he is in life. He is the epitome of living life to the fullest. He is as satisfied as it gets. Not everyone needs to have the ambition to take over the world, star in a movie, or be a fashion icon. Being content is one of the most difficult things anyone can do. The problem is, as Eric Thomas put it, too many people just kinda want success. They talk a big game and have the dreams but not the drive. That’s not ambition that’s laziness. Ambition is the active pursuit of your destination, and some people have an insatiable drive. Hoping the world falls on to your lap but never doing anything about it isn’t desirable. I’d rather you be a pothead who’s biggest concern in life is smoking up. That’s more respectable than a college brat talking about running his own business but doesn’t even find the time to write his own business plan.

Randal knows exactly where he is at all times. He does not have a glamorous job and is doing enough work to live the life he wants. As he tells his best friend Dante (who takes himself way too seriously) what would happen if you didn’t show up today? Do you think this store is gonna burn down? (I didn’t put this in quotation marks because I am just paraphrasing the quote). But he’s right. One of my favorite scenes in that movie is when Randal is talking to people coming into the video store and laughing at the customers. His boss clearly sucks and doesn’t keep an eye on his employees so he is just having fun while collecting a steady paycheck. I am not condoning laziness. I always hate it when I have someone at work who just does the bare minimum. But there is a huge difference between a weasel, two faced, jackass who is trying to move up the ranks in the company on the backs of other people and Randal, who is completely honest and would probably tell his boss “yeah I didn’t fucking do anything today except smoke weed and play some hockey on the roof.” Randal  just nailed it. He does enough work to have achieve self fulfillment. And if he loses his job, he would shrug it off and get another low paying job that fills his life’s needs.

I just hate fake ambition so much. I hate musicians who talk about their time in the studio when they spend most of their days talking about music, partying or in the club. I hate actors who just talk about theory and their place in the universe and why things aren’t working out for them, when in reality they aren’t actively seeking auditions. I hate writers who brag about the short story they wrote 7 years ago and still haven’t published it but feel the need to be experts on your work. Politicians who make promises they have no intention of keeping and will change as quickly as public opinion.

How has honesty become a commodity? It’s like you need to search it out and find a price in your range. Is integrity going to be on the stock market beside gold? Meanwhile indifference is skyrocketing with blue chips?

That’s another thing, why is indifference the standard for cool now? It’s like apathy is the fastest road to people liking you. But if you’re truly apathetic you don’t care about it. And since a lot of people are doing it for the attention they aren’t actually apathetic.

Fuck those fuckers.

-Fuck it

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